Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
