i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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