Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”

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(703): Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh” http://tfl.nu/trqs

Replies (15) Good night (660) Bad night (2793)
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(314): View more from Missouri

Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?

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(314): Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen? http://tfl.nu/sbh1

Replies (89) Good night (919) Bad night (12456)
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(613): View more from Ontario

my text book just quoted the cookie monster

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(613): my text book just quoted the cookie monster http://tfl.nu/5m8t

Replies (24) Good night (8378) Bad night (726)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word

(803): View more from South Carolina

dude its may

(843): View more from South Carolina

Work with me here, man.

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(843): Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word (803): dude its may (843): Work with me here, man. http://tfl.nu/2m3l

Replies (6) Good night (4075) Bad night (877)
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(541): View more from Oregon

Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk

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(541): Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk http://tfl.nu/l5et

Replies (7) Good night (4381) Bad night (1317)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.

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(615): They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this. http://tfl.nu/rcac

Replies (25) Good night (1683) Bad night (5709)
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(616): View more from Michigan

Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight

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(616): Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight http://tfl.nu/blku

Replies (10) Good night (1826) Bad night (623)
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(808): View more from Hawaii

Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.

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(808): Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you. http://tfl.nu/twhl

Replies (3) Good night (848) Bad night (1069)
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(303): View more from Colorado

How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?

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(303): How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads? http://tfl.nu/o7ne

Replies (10) Good night (1648) Bad night (532)
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(850): View more from Florida

I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.

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(850): I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend. http://tfl.nu/659e

Replies (12) Good night (2346) Bad night (479)
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(719): View more from Colorado

Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.

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(719): Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming. http://tfl.nu/flfj

Replies (5) Good night (1536) Bad night (448)
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(205): View more from Alabama

Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.

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(205): Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up. http://tfl.nu/igo8

Replies (6) Good night (2436) Bad night (555)
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(864): View more from South Carolina

That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.

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(864): That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it. http://tfl.nu/a8sj

Replies (4) Good night (646) Bad night (395)
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(627): View more from California

some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.

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(627): some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE. http://tfl.nu/adi8

Replies (9) Good night (1902) Bad night (378)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.

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(603): YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP. http://tfl.nu/wagi

Replies (6) Good night (902) Bad night (325)

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