Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
