she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
