Well apparently he's into motor boating.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
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