If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
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We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
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I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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