so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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