Me. At least after what I've been through.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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