wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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