that's an acceptable place to lick
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
