do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize