im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Drake has all the answers
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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