id be glad to
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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