Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
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