bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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