people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
