I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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