all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize