I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize