I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
