Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
My pussy is not your playground.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
