Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
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at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
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I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.