I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
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You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
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I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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