can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
areolas are like halos for boobs.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
