Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
