Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Randomize
