masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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