my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
