saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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