my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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