i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
