It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
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The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
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I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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