yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
