Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
