No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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