that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
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he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is dick and wine.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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