Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
