How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
