Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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