he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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