How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
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My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
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$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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