whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
