Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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