Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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