Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
