Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize