I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize