I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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