On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
